- Tue Feb 09, 2021 2:13 am
#7577
Chapter 1:
The Mother, the Father, and the Lost Ones
This is, of course, almost all remembered off the top of my head. It’s been bothering me, since I arrived here, a week or more ago. I don’t remember the exact date I woke up. I’ve been too lost. To dazed. But I need to write it all down, now. I need to get it out of my system.
Let’s start by saying that I’m not sure how much of this is even true, or just memories that are forming as a fragment of what ~was~ true in the back of my head. This is me, alone, avoiding sleep, staring into the fire in the inn and wondering just how much is true and how much is a pain in my ass. But this is it. This is my life story, that I recall.
There were four of us, living in the city together. Two young boys, my husband, and me. It was a perfectly mundane, normal life; I ran a book store, he sold fortunes, and our children did what all children do. I’d put my age at around twenty-nine, now.
We met earlier, when I was still travelling after the academy and trying to decide what I wanted to be. He was in the woods, and we fought bandits together. I used what talents I had, he used his brute force; together we did good. We weren’t heroes. We took payment. We laughed, and cried, and got hurt. I remember breaking my arm, and him setting it with leather straps and sticks. I remember him being scared of the machines in the city, and laughing at him to grow up. He was how old, again?
The first born was the sign that we should settle down. We found a place we enjoyed, one that was prosperous and right, and we set up our shop. I sold books; carefully picking and choosing what I thought was interesting, and teaching reading and writing to young children. I hated teaching. I had no patience, but I learned, as our child grew older. I calmed down. My fire dimmed.
I remember we fought about what he could do. The damned knuckles. He wasn’t pulling in much money. The world was changing; but I loved him. I couldn’t demand him to change. He watched the children, I worked, and occasionally, he threw the bones.
The second child was planned. It was our last. I hoped for a daughter; it was a boy. I remember Teddy’s face, when he held them both in his arms. I remember the tears. I also remember the sheer bloody fucking pain from birth. Doubt that’d leave me any time soon.
It was a fast recovery; we’d gotten a Shentarran to come and help us. Their magics, their healing, kept me from going insane. I don’t remember how, but I know that after that, we had no more children. Conscious choice.
I remember our walks in the woods. Teaching our boys how to swim. I remember laughing as they caught toads with their father, scolding as they hit each other with stick ‘swords’. I remember parts of our world, of our existence. The eldest was so studious, like me. He learned cantrips very early on - I remember encouraging him. I was saving up to send him to the Academy. To learn, to be like me.
The youngest, he was a earthworm, like his father. Always dirty, always in the plants. He loved our little garden. He loved watching the soldiers march by. His dad taught them both how to use a sword, from his own knowledge. And the truth is, I was terrified of it. What if they’d joined the army? What if they’d gone off and gotten hurt?
I’ve been wandering around, now. I remember parts of this place. Am I going to find our shop? Am I going to find our house, their bodies? My body?
The scar in the Academy shook me. I remember seeing the building on the outside before. I must have studied there. Was I part of that? Did I help with it? I can’t say. What I can say, is that I will find them. Dead, alive, something in between - I don’t care. They’re my family. They need graves. I need closure. I need to see them again. To hear them again. To hold them, again.
I have the dream about twice in a week, and it’s been going on since I first came out of the Well. It keeps repeating, and I keep trying not to sleep. We’re at the house, in the shop. Something happens. The door is knocked down, the house shakes. Books fall off the shelves. I hear screaming from behind me, clanking feet on the wood. I scream, start to throw what spells I know, but the world goes black. I hear screaming. It ends. I don’t want to remember more.
When I woke up in the Well, I came out covered in wounds on my chest, my arms, my back. I nearly bled out, crawling from the entrance. I spent some time healing, before I was sent out. I met Nergui, I explored the world, I learned about the Scars. I learned that it’s familiar.
I don’t want this to be familiar.
I don’t want them to be here. I don’t want to see them, shattered and broken on the floor. Teddy, his skull caved in; or my children, torn to pieces. I’ve been honing what Power I can pull, learning the intricate weaves and the various designs. Some of it is familiar; I remember the lower-circle spells like I’d done them before. Others, the more powerful ones, I have no memory of. It’s familiar but different. And I will continue to study, to improve, to learn them.
What will I do with this Power? What will I do with this world, shattered and broken?
I am not a hero. I am not someone who will join the Reeves, the Millers, the Dredgers, without reason. I am just a person, a lost and scared individual. I don’t care about anyone else; I want my family. To hell with the Well, with these people, with everything they think they stand for. The world has ended. I don’t give a damn about them. They can survive without me.
We were paying off our shop. We had a little garden, where we sold vegetables. I was dabbling with alchemy, using what knowledge he and I knew of the local herbs. It wasn’t a perfect life. It wasn’t a grand, wondrous existence. It was normal. It was perfectly safe. It was everything we could ever have wanted.
What would they get with me, here? Someone who used to teach, who knows a few cantrips. They have more useful Risen to deal with. I’ll do my part in hunting Scars, and that’s it. Token service. To fuck with their expectations. To fuck with this ‘better future’. I don’t care about the future. I want the past.
‘Live for the future, for there is naught but sorrow behind you’. What sort of future is it, without them?
I just want my family back.
The Mother, the Father, and the Lost Ones
This is, of course, almost all remembered off the top of my head. It’s been bothering me, since I arrived here, a week or more ago. I don’t remember the exact date I woke up. I’ve been too lost. To dazed. But I need to write it all down, now. I need to get it out of my system.
Let’s start by saying that I’m not sure how much of this is even true, or just memories that are forming as a fragment of what ~was~ true in the back of my head. This is me, alone, avoiding sleep, staring into the fire in the inn and wondering just how much is true and how much is a pain in my ass. But this is it. This is my life story, that I recall.
There were four of us, living in the city together. Two young boys, my husband, and me. It was a perfectly mundane, normal life; I ran a book store, he sold fortunes, and our children did what all children do. I’d put my age at around twenty-nine, now.
We met earlier, when I was still travelling after the academy and trying to decide what I wanted to be. He was in the woods, and we fought bandits together. I used what talents I had, he used his brute force; together we did good. We weren’t heroes. We took payment. We laughed, and cried, and got hurt. I remember breaking my arm, and him setting it with leather straps and sticks. I remember him being scared of the machines in the city, and laughing at him to grow up. He was how old, again?
The first born was the sign that we should settle down. We found a place we enjoyed, one that was prosperous and right, and we set up our shop. I sold books; carefully picking and choosing what I thought was interesting, and teaching reading and writing to young children. I hated teaching. I had no patience, but I learned, as our child grew older. I calmed down. My fire dimmed.
I remember we fought about what he could do. The damned knuckles. He wasn’t pulling in much money. The world was changing; but I loved him. I couldn’t demand him to change. He watched the children, I worked, and occasionally, he threw the bones.
The second child was planned. It was our last. I hoped for a daughter; it was a boy. I remember Teddy’s face, when he held them both in his arms. I remember the tears. I also remember the sheer bloody fucking pain from birth. Doubt that’d leave me any time soon.
It was a fast recovery; we’d gotten a Shentarran to come and help us. Their magics, their healing, kept me from going insane. I don’t remember how, but I know that after that, we had no more children. Conscious choice.
I remember our walks in the woods. Teaching our boys how to swim. I remember laughing as they caught toads with their father, scolding as they hit each other with stick ‘swords’. I remember parts of our world, of our existence. The eldest was so studious, like me. He learned cantrips very early on - I remember encouraging him. I was saving up to send him to the Academy. To learn, to be like me.
The youngest, he was a earthworm, like his father. Always dirty, always in the plants. He loved our little garden. He loved watching the soldiers march by. His dad taught them both how to use a sword, from his own knowledge. And the truth is, I was terrified of it. What if they’d joined the army? What if they’d gone off and gotten hurt?
I’ve been wandering around, now. I remember parts of this place. Am I going to find our shop? Am I going to find our house, their bodies? My body?
The scar in the Academy shook me. I remember seeing the building on the outside before. I must have studied there. Was I part of that? Did I help with it? I can’t say. What I can say, is that I will find them. Dead, alive, something in between - I don’t care. They’re my family. They need graves. I need closure. I need to see them again. To hear them again. To hold them, again.
I have the dream about twice in a week, and it’s been going on since I first came out of the Well. It keeps repeating, and I keep trying not to sleep. We’re at the house, in the shop. Something happens. The door is knocked down, the house shakes. Books fall off the shelves. I hear screaming from behind me, clanking feet on the wood. I scream, start to throw what spells I know, but the world goes black. I hear screaming. It ends. I don’t want to remember more.
When I woke up in the Well, I came out covered in wounds on my chest, my arms, my back. I nearly bled out, crawling from the entrance. I spent some time healing, before I was sent out. I met Nergui, I explored the world, I learned about the Scars. I learned that it’s familiar.
I don’t want this to be familiar.
I don’t want them to be here. I don’t want to see them, shattered and broken on the floor. Teddy, his skull caved in; or my children, torn to pieces. I’ve been honing what Power I can pull, learning the intricate weaves and the various designs. Some of it is familiar; I remember the lower-circle spells like I’d done them before. Others, the more powerful ones, I have no memory of. It’s familiar but different. And I will continue to study, to improve, to learn them.
What will I do with this Power? What will I do with this world, shattered and broken?
I am not a hero. I am not someone who will join the Reeves, the Millers, the Dredgers, without reason. I am just a person, a lost and scared individual. I don’t care about anyone else; I want my family. To hell with the Well, with these people, with everything they think they stand for. The world has ended. I don’t give a damn about them. They can survive without me.
We were paying off our shop. We had a little garden, where we sold vegetables. I was dabbling with alchemy, using what knowledge he and I knew of the local herbs. It wasn’t a perfect life. It wasn’t a grand, wondrous existence. It was normal. It was perfectly safe. It was everything we could ever have wanted.
What would they get with me, here? Someone who used to teach, who knows a few cantrips. They have more useful Risen to deal with. I’ll do my part in hunting Scars, and that’s it. Token service. To fuck with their expectations. To fuck with this ‘better future’. I don’t care about the future. I want the past.
‘Live for the future, for there is naught but sorrow behind you’. What sort of future is it, without them?
I just want my family back.